Patient
by 0928soubi at docomo.ne.jp
Summary: Gackt and Hyde break up, and one attempts suicide, ending up in the hospital. Who was it? Gackt/Hyde/Gackt. Angst, homosexuality, no smut...


Warning: language, attempted suicide, angst, homosexuality. (no smut...wait, what? A NOT-SMUTTY FIC FROM ME! IS THIS POSSIBLE! Apparently so... o,o)

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this fic.

(a/n) Another fic where you have to guess who is who! Who is Gackt, who is Hyde, whatever... :D Not sure if I'll continue this yet...I just got the first two lines stuck in my head, went to the computer and just typed to get 'em out...I had fun writing it, though. (^.^)

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It had been three weeks since we broke up. Two and a half since I had been able to breathe on my own. My family thought I was doomed to be a vegetable-that I'd been in some sort of freak accident and would never awake. The doctors, and you, most importantly, knew it wasn't true. You knew I'd tried to kill myself, and that I was able to wake up, if only I wanted to. That's why you never spoke while you waited for my eyes to open, while you waited for me to look at you.

Whether you loved me or not, you were never shy about the fact that you loved how my eyes were always on you. I showered you with love, adoration, ridiculous emotions...

I feel you brush my bangs from my face, and I fight the urge to grab at your hand, kiss it as I always did. You're no longer mine, regardless of the fact that somewhere in both our minds, I will always be yours. You chuckle as my eyelids flutter minutely. As many mornings as we had spent together, you could tell when I was faking sleep so I wouldn't have to leave the protective circle of your arms. Your small laugh tapers off to silence, as you realize that I'm awake, and can most likely feel everything going on with my body. Your other hand, the one not petting my face, moved slightly on my knee, before slowly slipping off. I fought to keep a look of discontent from appearing on my face-rather difficult, considering the giant, awkward tube shoved down my throat. I forced myself to relax, to let the machine breathe for me to keep up the illusion for my family. The doctors, (and you, as always) knew the truth of what I had done. Attempted suicide, which was, like most things in my life, unsuccessful. I asked the nurses and doctors to cover for me, make it seem like me slamming my car into a solid brick wall on a straight road was a complete accident. My mother and father believed it, perhaps even my sister, but those who knew me better realized something was up. My closest and oldest friends all felt that there was more to it (I'd heard them talking in the hall), though you were undoubtedly the only one who knew I was conscious.

I felt your gaze on me, and desperately fought the urge to open my eyes and come crawling back to you. I refused to do that; as much as I loved you, there was no way I could let that happen. You were the one to end it, to break it off, just for our fucking careers. You knew I'd give up everything to have you, and I suppose, in your own twisted way, you annihilating my heart was simply for my own protection? Bull shit, even to my ears. It was obvious what your choice would do to me, and you made it anyway...fuck you. Fuck you, you evil bastard. You destroyed me...I can tell you were surprised I hadn't sought death earlier. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if you had placed bets on how many hours I had lasted. If my calculations were correct, I'd lasted approxiamtely 73.

I cracked open an eye, checking the clock beside my bed, and found that I was right. Tempted as I was to look at your tragically beautiful face, I closed it once more. Masochistic, yes. Stupid, no.

I could practically hear the gears turning in your brain, something which terrified me. My heart pounded in my chest as your breath tickled my ear, a rather embarrasing fact, as the heart monitor beside my bed showed it. A smirk as lips press against my skin. I raised a hand, about to wrap it around your neck to bring you closer, when you spoke.

"There's no hope for us. You should have died."

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(a/n) Should I write more? I'm kinda content to leave it as a one-shot drabble...hmmm...I'm curious as to who you think is the patient, and who the evil bastard man. :D If I make a sequel/second chapter, I'll probably reveal it...usually when I write fics like this, even I don't know who is who. Hopefully the change made it better, easier to understand? :D

Please review!


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